Struggle

Standing at the banks of the Tanana River

As I sit here I think about all the struggles I have to overcome and one has been more difficult then the others I have a learning disability and I struggle with reading and writing comprehension which means I have a hard time getting whats in my head to either come out in the right words or in what I am writing. Everybody struggles in life in one thing or another , do I have enough money or how can I help others with my riches, am I going to be able to provide my family with what they need. I feel I am being torn between serving my country once again and joining the Priest hood I feel in my heart that thats what God truly wants me to do but I fight it for the simple fact I want a family. I long to be called father and have my children come to me with their problems or praise them when they are doing great things with in their lives. With that Jesus maybe saying that He wants me to be a father in His church and the people that attend be my children that I help with their struggles in life.

Looking down the Tanana River

  I pray one day I hear what Christ wants me to do and I can put aside what I want so I can better serve Him. I have also been praying as well that I find a friend and that was answered. I had dinner tonight with my new friends we had Halibut that they caught and Grayling that I caught on Sunday ice fishing at Birch Lake it was amazing. They also took me out to eat on Easter which was very nice that way I wasn't eating a peanut butter and jelly for my Easter dinner. We went to Pikes Landing they had a buffet set up with a very wonderful selection.

 Since I have been up here I have been very blessed with my many prayers Jesus has answered, without Him I would be nowhere, lost in my ways, yearning to want to help others but not knowing where to turn for guidance on how to do so. Like it is written "Through Him all things are possible" I was once told before you talk to man about God you should talk to God about man and thats why I have taken my journey to reconnect with our Lord and Savior.

My fishing Hole

I am lifted each and every time I listen to Christian music it gives me the drive I need to push through my struggles it helps me deepen my thoughts and feelings with Jesus and makes me feel all that I do will make a difference in somebody's life. Lord strengthen me to have the courage to become the leader you want me to become and if that means becoming a Priest then your will be done guide me down the path and I will follow your light and spread the good word to your children Lord I am your servant and I want to help you tend your flock of people and bring them back to the Shepard our loving God